My grandad died two years ago and had Alzheimer's.

I knew I didn't visit him enough or try hard enough with the relationship, but I didn't do anything about it. Life got in the way. When he developed Alzheimer's I felt less bad about it because I knew he didn't really know who I was anymore anyway.

Cut to the last day I visited him, perhaps a month before he died, and as we go to leave, my dad puts his hand on my shoulder and asks my grandad if he knows who I am. Grandad smiles at me and says "Of course, that's Grzzlrbr!"

Devastating. I always be ashamed that I didn't spend more time with him.

I feel more connected to my friends and I feel so guilty. I know your family was supposed to come first but I've always felt disconnected from them. I have an amazing older sister and two cute but annoying younger sisters. I have a mom and dad and I'm pretty sure they love me, but i just don't feel like I'm part of the family.

There are things that I tell my friends that none of my family members know. I always have an invisible barrier between my family members as if they're strangers. I know its wrong and I don't know why I feel this way.

parathesian

As a child, I always wondered how much cooler it would be to grow up and do “adult things”. Now as a teen, I realise how much of a f**k-up my life is. I don’t have goal or ambition I’m passionate about but I’m trying to find out what I would like to truly do. Not knowing what my future could possibly hold for me really scares me and I’m just so afraid of having to go through that.